Tuesday, 4 October 2011

TV time

Well hello.  How are we all?

I am enjoying an evening in front of the telly. K is out all night so I am in control of the Sky remote. Not having to wait for the Simpsons or Futurama to finish means that there is a lot more time in the evening to get my programmes watched - it's great.  I am currently LOVING a romcom (as far as I'm concerned there are no other films - I am a hopeless romantic) called Going the Distance. Thank goodness for Sky Movies. The only problem is I thought it was going to be fantastically awful but I'm already hooked - it's even better than The Proposal so I can't really focus on anything else. I'm meant to be doing work stuff as well but I can't be arsed. I'll keep rambling on to you instead.

I am getting through a lot of TV at the moment. The greatest thing about G being at school all day is that during Ted's sleep I am now able to make the most of Sky Plus.  The only problem is that the Sky box is in the living room which is at the front of the house with three windows facing the street. At first I made sure the blinds were closed so I could do my shameful and guilt ridden telly watching in private. Watching TV in the daytime is such a clich√©, particularly as I'm usually eating chocolate at the time. Being an overweight housewife watching TV and eating chocolates in the middle of the day, I didn't want people walking past the house to judge me and mentally tut at such an obvious stereotype.  That was in the first week though, now I am totally brazen about it and open the blinds purposefully so that people can see me. I have been up from 6am, made packed lunches, done school runs, emptied the dishwasher, cleaned, wiped, shouted, cajoled, forced and hurried etc etc etc etc so I deserve a frigging lunch hour and if I want to watch Glee or Modern Family at 1 o'clock whilst eating weight watchers chocolate or Quality Street K left in the cupboard then they can just suck it up and get on with their day. I am liberated from my feelings of guilt and the idea that sitting down in the day is lazy. People who work at a desk sit down all day without feeling guilty - why should I feel guilty over an hour? So from now on I say let them look - they're probably just jealous as they're walking and I'm sitting. Plus there is a positive side to my telly watching, it puts me in a jolly mood. Modern Family is hi-larious and it puts me in a happy frame of mind for the afternoon pick up ordeal. That is obviously a benefit to the children, so actually, I'm just being an extra specially great mother. Who knew?

Daytime TV is a luxury and I am making the most of it while I can. Other luxuries are fleeting. The Cava has not lasted long. I am already one jar down on the Marmite and the exciting loo roll I brought back from Mums has run out. You are never going to believe this but it was loo roll WITH cashmere - not just 'the feel' of cashmere but actually 'enhanced with extracts of cashmere'. CAN you imagine. From Waitrose naturally. It is bad enough that whilst I am trudging around Asda and Lidl I do so in the full knowledge that the aisles in Waitrose are wide, welcoming and clean but now I also have to do it in the full knowledge that the customers in Waitrose are not only enjoying their shopping experience far more than me but that when they get home they are sitting in their comfortable, clean bathrooms and wiping their pampered arses with sodding cashmere loo roll. It is actually too much to take. This month is most definitely not an 'extract of cashmere' type of month and it is making me bitter and resentful. Although I do have my eye on that new health lottery. It's only 100k prize fund but I have won it and spent it many times in my head already. I am yet to buy a ticket though.

Oh, the weekend. Saturday was SHIT. Sunday was AMAZING. We went to Whitstable which was a Hell of a long way, especially with G asking 'if we were there yet' as we left SE23. But, it was totes (new word I'm trying out - I'm not sure if I'm 'Chelsea' enough to pull it off) worth it. We were in the sea for hours and I just kept saying, 'It's October, and we're all in the sea - in October!'. Even I got on my nerves. Monday was fabulous as a hangover from our happy moods on Sunday and then I woke up this morning feeling shattered and sorry for myself.  The day has most definitely improved since then right up until this evening when my 'spirited child' (fabulous term a parent from playgroup used today), Ted, threw most of the toy food from Bea's toy kitchen out of her bedroom window and into our front 'garden' (it's just a messy patch of land that technically belongs to the house but really only houses fox poo and the smelly bins with a few sad plants left over from the last owners - but there isn't a useful word for that so we'll make do with garden). Bea was a legend and ran down to pick them all up and put them back on her kitchen whilst I dealt with the lack of gas problem. I ran the bath this evening only to discover that there was no gas or emergency credit left and the bath was in fact freezing cold. Knowing that K was not coming home and that I was in my pyjamas already and so in no mood to run down to the shop and top up the meter, I came up with a genius plan to microwave water (the hob is gas too so I couldn't do saucepans) as well as using the kettle and I did eventually manage to provide a small puddle of luke warm water in time for them to get clean before bed. It was actually a lot easier then managing the usual bath time arguments over where they sit, toys, splashing, getting in, getting out, people's feet in other people's bottoms and other general bath time joys. I may run out of gas more often.

Right, the film has finished and so I can now go to bed with my belief in unrealistic happy endings blissfully reaffirmed. What would life be without Drew Barrymore and a romcom? Laters. x

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